Saturday, June 28, 2008

What's missing ????

"Change is the only thing that remains unchanged ". This is a sentence i had been saying and using again and again throughout the fours years of my engineering as I use to see everything around me transient..But still today there is a change i don't want to accept though i know i have to. The change is of being an engineering student to being nobody today till I join my job as stereotype I.T professional. Its the hard reality today that no matter how much i love my college and its students, i have spent my four years at this place and i have to leave and make way for the next batch. These fours years of my life have been the most eventful and may be somewhere down the line its the spontaneity and activity that I miss.
In life we get attached to certain things or people in a way which makes us think as they will always be ours as if they were a part of the self...Though we know that these things have to leave us one day in the ever changing course of life ,we fear even thinking of this happening(our mind thinks and imagines what we want it to) ...I have to live with this emptiness inside until it is filled with hollowness that the Indian IT sector has to offer. May be I am missing the classroom .the canteen, the tea shop, the common room, the Phoenix room ..But most of all missing the smiles of my juniors, hug from my batch mates and rare words of praise from my the profs and seniors.. The college is not about the brick ,the rooms ,the doors and the windows that represent the structure .I know I will be a part of a much grand and decorated office of a IT company but probably will always crave for the love and warmth that I got at this place …Any institution/organization is made up of its people and after you have left it the human part that u miss….
I miss sleeping late at nights(around 2-3 am) discussing various issues ,watching movies or dancing to various tunes (in case of a party) and very rarely mugging up in the panic stricken hours (during the exams).I remember making people wait as I was always late when I reached the college and I telling them on phone that I was on the gate while brushing my teeth…I remember giving gyan to juniors( mostly composed of mantras I never followed) and watching my ideas being rejected by my seniors because of them being too dreamy… I miss the music flowing in air during our late night parties and how each beat of every Pink Floyd song was distinct and clear…I miss how our thoughts became synchronized after a peg or two and how we use to keep hovering around the same topics like love, friendship ,sadness and life in general….Sometimes when I look back I think I have too much to miss and may be I am a very rich man today when it comes to memoirs…
Well I am waiting to be a part of an industry which is supposed to be very dynamic and growing …I am waiting to be confined in the cubical which is being made for me…I am waiting to earn money and then having no time to spend it… I am waiting to get used to not hearing those beats of music as distinct and clear ..I am waiting to see people around me being replaced every now and then ..I am waiting to get used to not seeing people once the closest to me for months or lifetime…I am waiting to get inhumanly used to change…